Many of you know that I have many opinions about love, relationships and sex. I'm not against any of the aforementioned...in fact I hope to find love, and that will lead to the others.
The problem with so many people I know is that they confuse love and attraction. People use the word "love" too loosely and that makes it lose it's meaning once you finally find that person that you truly love. Also, people use sex as a cornerstone of their relationships. Sex is not supposed to be abused like it is today, with people having multiple partners with no relationship between so many of them.
I have a friend that has been absorbed in sex, love and relationships since we were teenagers. She has had a few serious relationships, but wonders why none of them work out for too long. I think it's because she hasn't actually been in love and her relationships revolved around sex (among other things I have opinions about). She is currently fighting for custody of her oldest daughter, going through a divorce with the father of her twins, and living with the father of her youngest daughter.
True, I'm not in a relationship right now...and I'm a virgin...and not sure if I've ever been in love before. I have had relationships though and they ended in a mutual decision (none of that high school crying drama that so many other girls went through). I'm still friends with most of my ex-boyfriends because we have respect for each other. We built our relationships on things that relationships are meant to be built on....respect, loyalty, friendship...and yes, attraction. When a relationship like that ends, it shouldn't be a heart breaking event because you know that you weren't right for each other and because of the respect you have for one another, you truly want the best for the other person.
I think that sex should only come into the relationship when you TRULY know that you love the other person and there is a commitment to be loyal to each other. There are people (even some of my friends) that think that my opinions are prudish but I think they are the way things are supposed to be. I'm not saying that every time you have sex it should be candles, rose petals and romantic music...but it should be an event that you put your whole self into...physically and emotionally. So many people that I know only put their physical selves into it, when making love should be an emotional experience as well. When you have sex, I believe that it's a way to express your love (not prove it).
Anyway...enough of that. Just got on my soapbox for a minute.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Sunday, February 15, 2009
The Hardest Month Yet....Birthdays
Well, for those of you that don't know...February is usually a very busy month for my family....Valentine's Day, my mom's birthday, and then my older brother's birthday. This year is going to be very different for us though...my older brother, Tom, isn't with us to celebrate his birthday on the 25th. Of course, this month has been harder for some of the family than past months. The days before my birthday (March 3) will be hard too...because between February 25 and March 3 has always been our "birthday celebration" when we have special meals and desserts and usually have our first cookout for the year.
Anyway, enough of that....yesterday was Valentine's day. We started the day with a phone call from my youngest brother saying that he, my younger brother and their friend were stuck because her car had died and they needed a jump. After close to an hour hooked up to Tara's car, we decided it was not just the battery. They all ended up coming to the house while my mom and I went out for our annual Valentine/birthday meal and a little shopping. Nothing too exciting.
Today we're having a family meal and whatever cake or ice cream mom decides on...she suggested lemon icebox pie, but I told her we'll do that for Tom's birthday like we've always done. So....we've got to decide what she'd like and fix it for everyone later.
Mom and I have been hoping to hear from one of my best friends from school so that we could keep her youngest daughter for a while...mom wants the distraction and I just love the little girl!! Anyway, nothing really new this week...maybe next week will be more exciting.
Anyway, enough of that....yesterday was Valentine's day. We started the day with a phone call from my youngest brother saying that he, my younger brother and their friend were stuck because her car had died and they needed a jump. After close to an hour hooked up to Tara's car, we decided it was not just the battery. They all ended up coming to the house while my mom and I went out for our annual Valentine/birthday meal and a little shopping. Nothing too exciting.
Today we're having a family meal and whatever cake or ice cream mom decides on...she suggested lemon icebox pie, but I told her we'll do that for Tom's birthday like we've always done. So....we've got to decide what she'd like and fix it for everyone later.
Mom and I have been hoping to hear from one of my best friends from school so that we could keep her youngest daughter for a while...mom wants the distraction and I just love the little girl!! Anyway, nothing really new this week...maybe next week will be more exciting.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Just a hello....and gripe about Valentine's Day
Well, the weekend is here again! I'm glad to report, that after ice storms, my family was only out of electricity Tuesday night through Saturday afternoon. We were lucky to have it back so soon, especially considering that we live in the country. Others weren't so lucky...a close friend of mine, Blake, said they just got their power back on yesterday.
Our cell phones have been having problems, but I think they're fixed now. We live near a cell phone tower and usually have perfect reception....however, for like the past week, there will be times we have NO signal strength at all. Anyway, I think it's fixed....and the number of texts I've been getting assure me of that.
We have been watching my niece this week some. We picked her up on Wednesday and she is going home this afternoon. She's two and a half....and a mess! We made up a song the other day (my niece and I) that she is singing while I type. "Madison's a booger head. Booger head, booger head. Madison's a booger head. hahaha hahahaha. Madison's a boo---ger Head!!" She loves it and sings it in all kinds of voices.
Anyway, I guess I'm just as boring this time as I was in the last post. Chandler, my toy poodle, has adjusted to having another boy dog in the house...but still barks and growls and Joe and Anthony, my brothers. Of course, because of his size Mom and I think it's cute...I guess we should try to train him away from that.
Valentine's Day is next week. I don't think I could like a holiday any less. I think that couples should celebrate their love for each other 365 (366 in some cases) days a year, not one day that we have assigned on a calendar. Valentine's day is a holiday that, I think, shows that we have scheduled our lives so much that we need to assign a day to show the person (or people) that we love how much we care for them. It's a pitiful holiday because if you are truly in love or love someone, you shouldn't have to have a single day set apart on the calendar to celebrate that love. It should be celebrated on a daily basis with as much gumption as people put into Valentine's day. However, if you use Valentine's day as a "love reinforcement" day, spending more time and effort to celebrate the love that you do each day, then you fully deserve to celebrate this day with your loved one. I think my gripe is that so many people are so busy after the holidays that they use Valentine's day as a love catch-up day....squeezing as much love into one day as they can because they haven't celebrated that love since the holidays.
Anyway, I guess that's all I have for now.
Our cell phones have been having problems, but I think they're fixed now. We live near a cell phone tower and usually have perfect reception....however, for like the past week, there will be times we have NO signal strength at all. Anyway, I think it's fixed....and the number of texts I've been getting assure me of that.
We have been watching my niece this week some. We picked her up on Wednesday and she is going home this afternoon. She's two and a half....and a mess! We made up a song the other day (my niece and I) that she is singing while I type. "Madison's a booger head. Booger head, booger head. Madison's a booger head. hahaha hahahaha. Madison's a boo---ger Head!!" She loves it and sings it in all kinds of voices.
Anyway, I guess I'm just as boring this time as I was in the last post. Chandler, my toy poodle, has adjusted to having another boy dog in the house...but still barks and growls and Joe and Anthony, my brothers. Of course, because of his size Mom and I think it's cute...I guess we should try to train him away from that.
Valentine's Day is next week. I don't think I could like a holiday any less. I think that couples should celebrate their love for each other 365 (366 in some cases) days a year, not one day that we have assigned on a calendar. Valentine's day is a holiday that, I think, shows that we have scheduled our lives so much that we need to assign a day to show the person (or people) that we love how much we care for them. It's a pitiful holiday because if you are truly in love or love someone, you shouldn't have to have a single day set apart on the calendar to celebrate that love. It should be celebrated on a daily basis with as much gumption as people put into Valentine's day. However, if you use Valentine's day as a "love reinforcement" day, spending more time and effort to celebrate the love that you do each day, then you fully deserve to celebrate this day with your loved one. I think my gripe is that so many people are so busy after the holidays that they use Valentine's day as a love catch-up day....squeezing as much love into one day as they can because they haven't celebrated that love since the holidays.
Anyway, I guess that's all I have for now.
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